Father of the Bride jokes for weddings in April

The best thing you can do to keep any speech relevant and fresh is to have a few topical jokes thrown in to the mix. These should all be related to the day and occasion though; this isn't your audition for Have I Got News For You. Whether it's a public holiday, a chunk of tawdry celebrity gossip or a football team getting an absolute leathering; reference it if it fits the bill. Our selection of topical father of the bride speech jokes gets an update more often than a Windows operating system. See, topical right? Kinda.

Displaying 12 topical father of the bride speech jokes

  1. For weddings April 1 - May 31

    Preparing for this event has been a massive learning curve for (Groom). One of the first things he had to try and get his head around was the fact that a Spring Wedding Fair doesn't have dodgems and a waltzer.

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  2. For weddings April 1 - May 31

    Spring is such a colourful time of year for a wedding, with vibrant fresh green springing forth everywhere, and yellows, reds, oranges and pinks splashed and sprayed all over the countryside . But enough about the aftermath of (Groom)’s stag do…

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  3. For weddings April 1

    As we're so close to April Fool's Day, I expected a few tricks and jokes today. And someone has replaced my suit with one that's several sizes too small - that's the only possible explanation of why my waistband's so tight.

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  4. For weddings April 1

    Some would question whether April 1st is a sensible choice for a wedding day. Well it's clear that (Groom) and (Bride) are entirely serious about their commitment to each other, no question about that. If anyone's a fool here, it's the chap who's paying for it all…..

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  5. For weddings April 2

    It's customary that the best man's speech contains a history lesson involving some major event that took place on the wedding day. Well, on this very day in 1805 the fairytale writer Hans Christian Andersen was born. So it’s only fitting that (Bride) and (Groom)’s courtship should culminate with a fairytale wedding here today!

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  6. For weddings April 16

    As it's an Easter wedding, you've got to eggspect some terrible yolks, and who better than the bride's old dad to crack 'em? After all, I've shelled out for today, so you'll have to put up with me….

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  7. For weddings April 6

    This wedding date coincides with the first modern Olympic Games back in 1896. I’ve being searching for an appropriate sporting metaphor for today’s proceedings, and I think I’ve found one … Marriage is a marathon, not a sprint. It’s a team event, not a solo race. And if you get caught checking out the competition too many times, you’re for the high jump.

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  8. For weddings April 10

    Today marks the anniversary of the invention of the safety pin back in 1849, a device designed to hold things together even when put under stress and strain, which could be a metaphor for marriage and, of course, both are generally associated with the appearance of nappies.

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  9. For weddings April 23

    The other big event happening today is, of course, the London Marathon, an event where lots of people have dressed up, psyched themselves and have prepared for a long, hard slog, much like the audience for this speech.

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  10. For weddings April 18

    On this day in 1924, Simon and Schuster, Inc. published the first "Crossword Puzzle Book. Let's hope that the married couple have no cause for crosswords.

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  11. For weddings April 21

    As well as today's wedding, 21st April is famous for being Shakespeare's birthday, so it seems appropriate that we are gathered here to celebrate two star crossed lovers, (Groom) and (Bride) are very much like Romeo and Juliet, although I'm sure today will have a happier ending.

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  12. For weddings April 1

    Not only is today (Bride) and (Groom)’s wedding but it is also the day of the famous Oxford and Cambridge boat race. One is an event which is the culmination of dedication, months of preparation and a requirement to be at the peak of physical fitness... and the other is a famous sporting event.

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